Another talk

Yesterday I gave a more pop science talk as part of our uni's mutlidisciplinary week. They mostly invited me because of my Big Boston Uni fellowship. It was fun to see my undergraduate project supervisor. He came to see it and was so proud of me. Everything went fine except midway I thought two people from the audience were gesturing that there was something wrong at the front of my shirt or trousers.
The whole thing was being filmed and I tend to stand closer to the audience so I was a bit worried and looked down at my shirt and trousers. I did the rest of the talk hiding behind the lectern. There was this moment that I thought I had blood streaming down my thights staining my trousers like the dreaded 28th of November 2013. And that the whole thing would be televised.Thankfully, there was no blood and the gestures were in my head. But obviously I will never get over that day. Even on good days the blood and sheer misery from the loss will be back to haunt me.